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What a Mother Learns in 18 Years

March 19, 2009 – 8:52 am

“That many battles are not worth fighting, but others definitely are, and sometimes one kind masquerades as the other.”

I’ve been pondering this sentence because I have felt that unsettling feeling too. Perhaps as parents, we waver on the question of ‘is this a biggie or one to let pass’ because we have so many of those decisions to make. And I’m always conscious that it’s a truly important job. In my corporate life, I saw people get all excited over a meeting or report and thought how misplaced their emotion was. But with kids, your efforts actually matter.

The sentence is from The New York Times Motherlode column by Lisa Belkin. Belkin writes a poignant and funny column worth reading.

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Freakonomics

March 13, 2009 – 10:58 am

“An incentive is a bullet, a lever, a key: an often tiny object with astonishing power to change a situation.”

That’s economist Steven D. Levitt talking about incentives as the root of his field of study, i.e. how people respond to negative and positive incentives.

Our economy is turned upside down these days so why not really shake ourselves up by reading a book which debunks commonly held beliefs. Levitt, with journalist Stephen J. Dubner, wrote Freakonomics: A Rogue Economist Explores the Hidden Side of Everything. The book takes conventional wisdom, applies facts and gets to the truth. Levitt takes on subjects from whether reading to your baby will actually make them a better student to what is more dangerous than guns. In one of the most controversial sections, Freakonomics asserts the main reason that violent crime is down is due to the Supreme Court’s 1973 Roe v. Wade decision which kept a generation of unwanted children from becoming criminals. No wonder reviewers called the 2006 book both engaging and incendiary.

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What Money can’t buy…

March 10, 2009 – 10:52 am

“Knowledge is wealth.”

Money can’t buy most truly important things in life. But this quote struck me as especially fitting for our harsh economic times. Learning is (usually) free. I see the joy in my children’s faces as they learn to read. Sometimes we forget as adults how fun the quest for knowledge can be. I want to know more about the constellations and to further my French. What’s on your Life Learning List ?

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CrazyBusy

March 4, 2009 – 11:46 am

“..to make the most out of this new world, to avoid feeling overbooked, overstretched, and about to snap, to make modern life become better than life has ever been, a person must learn how to do what matters most first. Otherwise, you will bulldoze over life’s best moments. You won’t notice the little charms that adorn each day, nor will you ever transform the mundane into the extraordinary.”

What a lovely way to think of the bright spots in even our gloomiest days. I can almost see the charms sparkling amid the clouds, the harsh word, or the late appointment.

This passage is from CrazyBusy by Edward M. Hallowell, M.D. which was published a few years ago (his newest book is Overloaded Circuits). Hallowell uses what he learned in treating Attention Deficit Disorder to give strategies on handling rampant busyness which he calls the problem and the opportunity of modern life. Sometimes at the dinner table, we share the high and low points of our day. Perhaps, we should only share the charms. I think there is positive power in recalling those moments from our crazybusy days.

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Abraham Lincoln Kind and Good

March 1, 2009 – 12:15 pm

“If I were to try to read, much less answer, all the attacks made on me, this shop might as well be closed for any other business. I do the very best I know how – the very best I can; and I mean to keep doing so until the end. If the end brings me out all right, what’s said against me won’t amount to anything. If the end brings me out wrong, ten angels swearing I was right would make no difference.”

I am in awe of the inner strength any president must have to be criticised daily from voices around the world – yet remain true and unwavering in his goals. It’s hard enough to withstand harsh words as a “regular” person. Lincoln was right; trust your inner core and perhaps put on blinders.

This blog title is from a song my kindergartners came home singing around President’s Day holiday:

“Abraham Lincoln kind and good
Was loved and honored by many
To always remember this president
We put his face on the penny.”

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Do you believe in Dog ?

February 24, 2009 – 10:42 am

“Consider the insomniac dyslexic agnostic. He stays up all night wondering if there really is a dog.”

There’s a first for everything. I haven’t blogged a joke before — but this one circulating on email chains got my funny bone. Ha!

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A loaf of bread and thou

February 22, 2009 – 9:55 am

“When you have only two pennies left in the world, buy a loaf of bread with one and a lily with the other.”

This old proverb reminds me of our current economy. Even if you haven’t had to face job loss or mortgage problems – I think we’re all looking at spending money differently. It forces me to assess the true value I get from a purchase. I value the experience of renting a movie more than buying a mocha. I ask myself if I need to own a book or can reserve it at the library. And I’d enjoy a free walk in our meadow with my family more than spending money on just about anything. Money is so intertwined with our values. These times help us see the status or superfluous purchase for what it is. It helps us separate the chaff from the wheat. Now if I could only find one perfect lily to put on my counter…

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In Pursuit of Imperfection

February 17, 2009 – 9:52 am

“Let’s not make the perfect the enemy of the essential.”

I’d like to make the case for the not-so-perfect. President Obama said this to lobby for his economic stimulus plan. However, it applies to so many things in life. The pursuit of perfection (which is arguably an impossible goal) can stall any action at all. Who or what is truly free from fault or defect? And in spending time seeking perfection, what other valuable things are we not doing?

When I’ve heard someone (usually a boss) ask for people to give 110 percent, I wonder if they skipped math class. That “go get ’em” attitude is ingrained in our culture. And yet this quote seems to applaud a really great effort – it values trying. So, instead of seeking perfection, let’s be thoughtful, let’s strive, and let’s remember to look for the lesson found when we stumble.

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Family Characters

February 10, 2009 – 9:30 am

“The family. We were a strange little band of characters trudging through life sharing diseases and toothpaste, coveting one another’s desserts, hiding shampoo, borrowing money, locking each other out of our rooms, inflicting pain and kissing to heal it in the same instant, loving, laughing, defending, and trying to figure out the common thread that bound us all together.”

Erma Bombeck (1927-1996) was a natural at combining wit and humor in one sentence. After having a family, she resumed writing and wrote columns on a wood plank table supported by cinder blocks. Soon she was in syndication and books and appearances followed. I think it’s hard to write funny. As she shows in this passage above, humor comes through in the little details the writer includes and the juxtaposition of the lofty and the everyday.

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Spring Break

February 7, 2009 – 9:27 am

“A vacation frequently means that the family goes away for a rest, accompanied by a mother who sees that the others get it.”

This quote from American writer Marcelene Cox made me laugh since we’re planning our spring break trip. It’s not so much a rest I’d like to get but some warmer weather. This morning it is 33 degrees and today’s “high” will only get about ten degrees warmer. We’re heading south but haven’t planned our exact route yet. Where ever it takes us – we’ll be off next month like heat seeking missiles!

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